Monday, October 7, 2013

Letting things go...

Today I wanted to share a story with y'all that I think about often. Just thinking about it helps me get in the mindset about how I can make my house to be our comfortable retreat (our castle-like home). 

When I first got married nine years ago, I remember my husband had certain "quirks" that would irritate the life out of me. Like leaving dirty laundry on floor, dishes on table, and things like that. (I know I might not be making him sound good here but he really is the most wonderful man!) One thing he did that really irritated me was after I made our bed, he would lay or sit on it in the middle of the day.

As silly as it sounds to me now, I remember getting so mad. I worked hard to make the bed "just right" then he would come afterwards and get a million wrinkles on it. I asked a friend around my moms age who had been married for many years if her husband ever did the same. She said he did. 

So I asked her "doesn't it bother you that he messes it up?" 

And she told me, "no not at all because I just pull the end of the bedspread a little and it's good as new. He was probably tired and it's his bed too."

Then it hit me. I had one of those a-ha moments. I could fix the bed a lot faster than nagging at him and then I could just forget about it. It would literally take two seconds out of my day to fix the bedspread! And my dear husband could relax for a moment.

I asked myself: Why was I sweating the small stuff? Why was I not letting him enjoy his house and bed? I was being way too much of a perfectionist. I was acting exactly opposite of how I want to be. I was nagging him over the dumbest of things. It really wasn't doing any of us any good. So I try to remember that story when something in the house happens that may irritate me. 

I would rather have him in my home with me making messes, than not having him at all. 
The people I share my house with are the people I love the most. They love me. It's not like they ever try to make more work for me. But now if i see something needs to be put up, instead of nagging my hard working hubby, I just do it myself. 

I would rather my family feel relaxed and comfy instead of worried about messing up something. So now if my husband or one of my kids get on the bed after I make it, I just jump right on too and chat with them. Letting go of stupid things really helps our house feel like the comfortable retreat castle-like home I want.


  1. yeah, Allie ... it's all about the people, the love, the memories, the conversations, the laughter. all that other stuff can wait!

    1. Exactly Linda! That is definitely the best way to live life :)

  2. What a great post I really enjoyed reading this :) I also heard a tip from an interior design class I did where the husband would always throw this clothes on the floor right next to the laundry basket and so the wife talked to him about why he cant just put his clothes in there and he said he throws them and misses - so she installed a small basket ball hoop above the basket for him to aim for and now they dont end up on the floor! I think its a very logical way to make ours homes into a place we live in, not to make a home and then try to live around it.

    1. Thank you so much Michelle! That is a great tip!! It makes so much sense, love it!